On this show we call hotels from the Diaper Derby to bet on Baby Battles in their parking lot. We also call places claiming that someone just Chris Hansened us in a hotel room while we were trying to meet someone from the internet. Thanks to @despicabledogs, @icecat, and @gretagarbage for joining for the fun and for everyone in the chat who suggested ridiculously funny wordplay to use.
I’m having a BBQ at Betty’s house. Make up later!
In this cathartic episode, @molinwolf and I called front desks to let them down gently that unfortunately they didn't get the job and we are going with another candidate. We also tried to get people to give us obviously fake reference checks to help felons get jobs, and some were kind enough to do so…
Then @matthew4 joined in the fun as we tried to coordinate a baby battles in the parking lot.
On this quick episode while I recover from a colonoscopy procedure I call up stores to ask questions about the guy in the white colonoscopy van parked outside and when I should expect my results.
Thanks to @Jesuspenus for the show title!
The good work of the Take-A-Wish Foundation (https://takeawish.org) continues. On this adventure we help a 9yo criminal on deathrow fill his dying wish to rob a bank and distribute the money to poor people the day of his execution. We get permission from various businesses to distribute wads of stolen cash to their patrons, before the feds arrive.
Thanks to:
- Allievera for joining as a Patreon!
- @licketysplit972 for the generous gift.
- @mbots for helping find some soundboard content for a call.
- @doglettuce for joining for a call.
- Everyone in chat for the hilarious and very dark ideas and lines.
Late start, great start. See you then!
Tonight we started with a paper clip and did 10 trade-ups finishing with a $50,000 airplane charter ride for the imaginary dying kids of the Take a Wish Foundation (https://takeawish.org). We definitely didn't cheat at all, ever.
It was fun and a nice change of pace!
Thanks to @iregretjumping for the hilarious graphic showing us meeting our goal.
On this fun unscheduled episode I debut the new website for the Take-A-Wish foundation at https://takeawish.org/
I then proceed to call on behalf of Take a Wish to:
- pet stores, trying to grant a dying boy's wish to become a turtle
- funeral homes, trying to grant a dying boy's wish to be buried alive
- slaughterhouses, trying to grant a dying 4yo boy's wish to operate a band saw
and more! Crazy show.
Thanks to:
- @licketysplit972 for the generous donation!
This show will probably get me cancelled. It's DARK. I don't think I've ever gotten more "nobody has ever asked me that before" from one show than this one.
On this show I called:
- mechanics to retrofit my car with a smuggling / trafficking compartment
- mechanics, on behalf of the Take A Wish Foundation, trying to get them to retrofit a car to work like KITT from Knight Rider to fill a dying child's wish.
- mechanics, to retrofit a car to explode, so we could use it in a modern viking funeral for dying kids
- balloon stores, trying to help a dying kid tie hundreds of balloons to themselves. We also tried the same premise with a corpse and that was fine with them too.
- balloon stores, trying to send a Chihuaha into the stratosphere with a bunch of balloons, for a Red Bull stunt. This was apparently perfectly normal.
Thanks to:
- @licketysplit972 and daridagoat for the generous gift
- @ozillator for the show title
- @ionlysmile and @cactusy for sharing numbers
- everyone in chat who helped with ridiculous ideas tonight, especially @iregretjumping with his viking funeral idea.
On this episode I call up hotels to:
- gently break up with them
- tell them I missed my period, what should we do?
- tell them my uncle Dennis passed away.
- tell them I need their help faking my uncle's death.
- complain that a loose despicable dog is interfering with my efforts to spread my uncle's ashes all over their property.
- ask for extra towels for the water birth we are planning in an inflatable kiddy pool their room
- ask them for child support since we got pregnant there
- ask if the drawer full of beans is complimentary
- try to get a refund for an egg sandwich
Thanks to:
- @EvilOctopus for the show title
- @EvilOctopus, @Gordo, @ozilator, @despicabledogs, @icecat, @jesuspenus and everyone else in chat who shared inspiration or funny ideas to say.
