On this fun unscheduled episode I debut the new website for the Take-A-Wish foundation at https://takeawish.org/
I then proceed to call on behalf of Take a Wish to:
- pet stores, trying to grant a dying boy's wish to become a turtle
- funeral homes, trying to grant a dying boy's wish to be buried alive
- slaughterhouses, trying to grant a dying 4yo boy's wish to operate a band saw
and more! Crazy show.
Thanks to:
- @licketysplit972 for the generous donation!
This show will probably get me cancelled. It's DARK. I don't think I've ever gotten more "nobody has ever asked me that before" from one show than this one.
On this show I called:
- mechanics to retrofit my car with a smuggling / trafficking compartment
- mechanics, on behalf of the Take A Wish Foundation, trying to get them to retrofit a car to work like KITT from Knight Rider to fill a dying child's wish.
- mechanics, to retrofit a car to explode, so we could use it in a modern viking funeral for dying kids
- balloon stores, trying to help a dying kid tie hundreds of balloons to themselves. We also tried the same premise with a corpse and that was fine with them too.
- balloon stores, trying to send a Chihuaha into the stratosphere with a bunch of balloons, for a Red Bull stunt. This was apparently perfectly normal.
Thanks to:
- @licketysplit972 and daridagoat for the generous gift
- @ozillator for the show title
- @ionlysmile and @cactusy for sharing numbers
- everyone in chat who helped with ridiculous ideas tonight, especially @iregretjumping with his viking funeral idea.
On this episode I call up hotels to:
- gently break up with them
- tell them I missed my period, what should we do?
- tell them my uncle Dennis passed away.
- tell them I need their help faking my uncle's death.
- complain that a loose despicable dog is interfering with my efforts to spread my uncle's ashes all over their property.
- ask for extra towels for the water birth we are planning in an inflatable kiddy pool their room
- ask them for child support since we got pregnant there
- ask if the drawer full of beans is complimentary
- try to get a refund for an egg sandwich
Thanks to:
- @EvilOctopus for the show title
- @EvilOctopus, @Gordo, @ozilator, @despicabledogs, @icecat, @jesuspenus and everyone else in chat who shared inspiration or funny ideas to say.
On this fun show (2 parts), @iregretjumping and @criefaux join as we call hotels and run a special trivia show called Inn-Telligence, where the front desk just needs to answer 3 simple trivia questions to win a pizza and ice cream party for dying children.
Thanks to:
- @iregretjumping for the amazing show idea and show title.
- @iregretjumping and @criefaux for joining!
- @cactussy, @mbots and @criefaux for helping with audio files
- @ionlysmiles and @licketysplit972 for the generous gifts.
On this fun show (2 parts), @iregretjumping and @criefaux join as we call hotels and run a special trivia show called Inn-Telligence, where the front desk just needs to answer 3 simple trivia questions to win a pizza and ice cream party for dying children.
Thanks to:
- @iregretjumping for the amazing show idea and show title.
- @iregretjumping and @criefaux for joining!
- @cactussy, @mbots and @criefaux for helping with audio files
- @ionlysmiles and @licketysplit972 for the generous gifts.
In this episode I:
- look to dispose of room sand;
- pan for gold in the hotel sewage system;
- thank the hotel for the complimentary suitcase full of women's clothing they left outside my door;
- try to coordinate bathing in the pool;
- Resign from my position from a bunch of hotels, because I'm insulted that nobody even knows my name or that I work there.
Thanks to:
- @dustbernadette for joining as a Patreon!
Late show! On this show I:
- try to rent spaces, from a biblically speaking point of view;
- Pretend to be a journalist and try to get people to confirm insane quotes they supposedly said for my upcoming article.
- My volunteer valet service that gives convicts a second chance, Cons for Cars, (thanks @iregretjumping) somehow loses a Porsche;
- Coordinate leaving refrigerators in people's parking lots while I go on vacation.
Thanks to:
- @assjuice, @reaperdiamondt, @matthew4 for the ideas and phone numbers
Hooboy 3 fun, pun-filled premises tonight and all caught lots of fish:
Calling hotels to ask about ladpads, manpons and other male sanitary hygeine products.
Calling businesses to ask what is REALLY going on in the Employees Only room, with @doglettuce.
Calling pet stores to buy doggie condoms or other reprodogtion pawphylactic pawducts. We also called dog trainers to see if they will train my dog to pull out so I don't need to neuter him. Funny idea @bread336!
Thanks to:
- @mrbombadil for joining as a Patreon
- @namesakejake for the show title
- @gordo, @bread336, @shoebarf, @catnumberwang, @doglettuce, @ozillator, @wdum and everyone else in chat who helped come up with hilarious puns to use in the show.
